Responsibility, BEDA Day 2

Yesterday was full of taking the dog for a walk, [check out my VEDA/FEDA videos all month on my YouTube channel] getting paint to paint my room, and spending the rest of the day at the theatre working on stage management [SM] preliminary work for the year. All of these tedious and fun tasks got me thinking about how many responsibilities I place upon myself every day, and how so many people add responsibility to their lives all the time.

I chose to start walking my sister's dog because I felt that not only did I need a fitness routine, but that the puppy needed to lose some 'puppy fat' that she had gained while I'd been away. One routine added: 6:30am walks.

I begged my mom to let me paint my bedroom because I hated the color and I wanted to make a lasting change at our house that she could work with. Another responsibility on my plate: painting a room on my own.

Stage management in general is one of the most grueling processes I've ever been through in my life. Add on the pressure of me wanting to be perfect, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Taylor and I worked on paperwork, SM kits, bulletin boards, and putting together a new handbook for all SMs. It doesn't sound hard, and it isn't, but add that to the list of hundreds of other things I need to get done for each show, and try the addition of about 100 more responsibilities: stage managing.

It seems that responsibility finds me, asks me to do all of this work. Maybe it was because I was so self-centered in middle school and high school, and now karma is paying me back. Maybe it's because I am gaining more of my mother's work ethic, and I am getting annoyed when things aren't getting done properly. Maybe it's because I'm about to graduate and I want to busy myself so I don't have to think about the future. Or maybe it's because I feel like I have to prove something to the world.

Does everyone feel like this? I think so. We wouldn't have volunteers out in the world helping the world become a better place if that wasn't so. But I'm not even going to mention the slackers. Maybe that can be another day's theme. I know that they exist, and maybe another reason I place so much responsibility on myself is because I don't want to be like the idiots that lie around doing nothing, caring about nothing, and thinking of nothing but themselves. I want to leave a lasting legacy in this world and I want the people I've met to remember that I was someone they could depend on.

So these 'themes' for BEDA might be very self-reflective, or maybe they'll have a global perspective. I'm not sure yet, but I hope whoever reads this like it. Now, time to paint!

Current song - rockmyrun mix again. Pump Your Fist in the Air

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